Saturday, December 22, 2012

Don't feel sorry for yourself. Only assholes do that.


It’s 3 a.m. and I’m sick. I haven’t been able to sleep well for about at least a month now. I think it’s time I invest in a bed. That’s either beside point or exactly the point. I’m usually comfortable, but my thoughts are unable to calm themselves.

This year is rapidly coming to an end. I think a good theme for this year for me is “people telling the truth < people lying”. That’s not to say that I prefer people lying, but that the number of people telling the truth is less than the number of people full of shit. This theme comfortably encompasses this year and possibly even more, but who’s to say, it’s just fitting. On so many fronts, this holds true for almost every facet of my everyday life. Stepping back and actually thinking about it kind of surprises me.

My eyes are tired. I’ll edit this later and add more…or maybe that’s a lie and I just want to fit in.

…but I’ll probably add more tomorrow night.



 



Probably not though.

Friday, November 30, 2012

It's different being afraid when there's the hope it will amount to something.

A good amount of time has passed since my last entry. My head has been nowhere near the rest of my body. It's raining now which is calming. I can listen to this forever. I wish the sound of rain outside was white noise when it's quiet for the rest of my life...and then some. Since I moved back to Orinda in July, I've been sleeping on a couch. I thought I would be alright with it for however long i would be living here (6 months...maybe more), but it's starting to not be comfortable anymore. I can't remember the last night I slept all the way till morning without waking up. I'll fix this soon.

Tomorrow morning, I'm going to watch Killing Them Softly.



Awesome cast. Great director. I'm excited. I recently got a ticket to see Sigur Ros in April. Supposedly, this tour will have a lot more musicians in accompaniment and will be a one of a kind tour...we'll see. They are spectacular live regardless, but with all this said, I really am looking forward to it now. Buying a ticket also came with a free EP so that works. Tomorrow morning I also plan on getting a ticket to see Quicksand in SF in two months. I love that band and since they are broken up (no word on a new record...just a mini-tour) I can't miss this. I saw them once before they split when they were touring with Deftones back in 1998 I believe.





Watching Mad Men. I'm all caught up on the shows I enjoy (Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Sons of Anarchy, Game of Thrones, The League, and Boardwalk Empire) Falling asleep while these shows are on in the background is really relaxing and redirects my rapid-fire thoughts. As long as it's an episode I've seen, it's like hanging out in a room with friends talking softly. I'm listening and my brain is as well, but I'm not thinking about anything that they are saying; just hearing them speak...make sense? Didn't think so. Recently, this is the only way I get any sleep. Speaking of which...

Monday, October 8, 2012

Just a quote and a song.

"I had nothing to offer anybody except for my own confusion."









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Thursday, September 20, 2012

Dreaming with our heads cut off.

I have a feeling the band I will be hooked on for the next few weeks will be Autolux. I've had one of their albums for a while now and saw them open for NIN and Queens of the Stone Age and wasn't too big a fan. Giving them another go now, I really enjoy it. Kind of lazy sounding and almost shoe-gazish, but some other fun qualities.




I always get overwhelmed when writing blogs. Trying to write an ample amount while maybe writing about what I've been up to or what my current interests are...I don't know. I feel like these short bursts of thought are more accessible/interesting/whatever.

I'm just getting over being sick. I've been cooped up for a few days pretty much with the love of Ampersand and movies found on the internet keeping me company. E.T., Paradise Lost 2 and 3, Young Adult, Cosmopolis, The Adjustment Bureau, 30 Minutes or Less, etc...Also, a very kind girl dropped off some supplies, which I directly connect with how good I currently feel, so let's all thank her. Thank you.



I currently feel like being in the middle of nowhere.



I'm reading Raw Shark Texts amongst a few other books. This book is mighty refreshing and interesting. It's taking me somewhere completely new.



Now that I have internet where I am living, I might be updating this thing here a bit more, but don't hold your breath. With help from the iphone, it's so easy to update (or whatever this can be called) via facebook, twitter, instagram, etc... Yeah, sure, I can do all that on here as well, but if I check-in on the go or post pictures from that place with this person, then it's pointless to rehash it all out here for those same people not to read it. I'm not even going to reread that to make sure it makes sense. This is all just making me so lazy, but I don't mind at this moment. Not at this moment either. Maybe tomorrow I'll feel different and there will be more to read from me not having much to say.

Alex Pardee rereleased his book Awful Homesick which is definitely worth checking out. His work should be looked at regardless, but yeah...all artists connected to zerofriends should be looked into. Great stuff all around.



I think I'm going to go walk now. Dropped 35 lbs since July. I'm under 200. My goal is to lose 10 more pounds. We'll see.



Thursday, August 16, 2012

Scatterbrained about most things. Focused on one thing.


It’s Saturday night. 10:09pm as I start this blog. This time yesterday, Ed, Cliff and I were on our way out to a random pier in San Francisco in a neighborhood I have never set foot in nor would want to at that time of night.

As we made our way down the correct street, looking for the address we received in an e-mail filled with specific directions, the streets got emptier and buildings became more dilapidated. We came up on a giant van slowly making their way down the street. We knew said vehicle had to be part of the Rental Car Rally. Once we found the address and made our way behind the building, still following the van, we came upon a group of about 9 or 10 cars containing about 4-5 people each. Everyone was gathered in the middle of the improvised parking lot; along with an iPod hooked up to an amp was blaring music, while the cars surrounded everyone. Just as we were about to park, the door to the van we’d been following slid open and out jumped 2 guys dancing, wearing unicorn masks. This is how our night started and it just got crazier and more exciting as time went on.

Some of the things that followed were:
-       Drove through the mountains (and pouring rain) to some art compound (?)
-       Hit a bird with our windshield
-       Ate lunch in an airplane
-       At one point, we came back to our car to find it covered in eggs, glitter, condoms, and strawberry jelly covered tampons.
-       Went in a seven story tree house.
-       One of the teams got arrested.
-       Etc…

I’m sure I’m missing some events or happenings, but this is something that if it is happening anywhere near the bay area or the greater state of California, I know Ed and I are down. I highly recommend you check it out where ever you are. Not to be missed.

(Now it’s Wednesday night, many weeks later at 11:29 pm and a lot has happened)

Went to a gallery at Zerofriends in Oakland a week ago, which was solid. A bunch of great artists were being showcased.

Been working and what not. I’ve lost over 20 pounds in the past few weeks. I’ve been walking 5 miles every morning (and sometimes at night), along with working out some and eating healthier and smaller portions. It works for me. Now that I’m seeing progress I’m excited about it and it’s just something I do every day. I don’t think about it much….I just do it. I have a lot more free time now that I’m single.

Ampersand and I have been hanging out more. She loves being in the hills and playing in the tall grass around the studio. I fucking love the hell out of that cat.

I saw a phenomenal film called The Intouchables. It was French and it wouldn’t surprise me if it wins best foreign film this year. Based on a true story, the two main characters are so easy to love.

Also, Safety Not Guaranteed made it into my top ten of the year so far. Great quirky, indie love story.  As did Moonrise Kingdom, but Wes Anderson has shit locked down so that’s not a surprise. I am curious as to see what he does with Johnny Depp in his next film.


It’s been almost a month since I added to this. I write these in Word and post them usually in the same night, but this one has just kind of gone on and on. I didn’t really feel like it was something interesting…Maybe it still isn’t, but I’m tired of having this file saved on my desktop so I will just post it. I feel like a completely different person than when I started this blog back in late June/early July. Not only have I lost a little over 30 lbs in all, but mainly on the inside I feel the change. I guess time will tell (as cheesy as that sounds, but it’s true).

Oh and Outside Lands was neat.

I promise the next time I update this bad boy more effort will be put into it. Can’t focus enough on this to make it worth while. OK then. Done for now.

Friday, June 22, 2012

They can chew you up, but they gotta spit you out.

Tomorrow is going to be long. Moving in to a spot in Orinda. It's like deja vu all over again. Then leaving at 11pm from San Francisco to participate in a Rental Car Relay with some friends. SF vs. LA. It will be a nice adventure of sorts. I've been wanting to do something like this that involves long drives and this gets bonus points for involving a giant fight with shaving cream and eggs.

Last night I saw Matt Skiba and the Sekrets at Bottom of the Hill. The show was good enough and pretty much better than expected. After hearing reviews of their very first show being sloppy and seemingly half assed (is that even a word?), I expected some of the same but to a lesser extent. Matt, Hunter, and crew had a few hiccups which tends to happen with Sir Skiba. Hunter was sporting a pretty rad Batman-ish mask the whole night which sort of reminded me of Eyes Wide Shut.




I plan on letting my creative juices flow a little more than normal. Not only planning, but looking forward to using all sorts of different mediums. I remember making short films, drawing, painting, etc... in late high school and shortly after, but it just kind of petered out as time went on. Not sure why. Ideas are currently being tossed around and the majority of them sound like a lot of fun.

Not too big of an update, I know. Pizza, a new bookshelf is going to come soon and I will send a picture your way. It should be significantly different than the other one I sent...if I ever did. Can't remember.

More to come...

Thursday, April 12, 2012

For my viewing pleasure...

A list of films I want to see that just got updated so I thought I would share...also it would be nice to have it readily accessible.

After Hours

After School

After The Wedding

Antares

Arizona Dream

The Artist

Away From Her

Ballets Russes

Beginners

The Best of Youth




The Best Years of Our Lives

Bird

The Blood of Heroes

Boy A

Calvaire

Character

Chariots of Fire

Che

Children of Paradise

Clean, Shaven




Clean and Sober

Conformist

The Crowd

A Dangerous Method

Dark Blue World

Dark Star

Days of Glory

Dead Snow

The Descendents

Departures




Devil In A Blue Dress

Earth

Elite Squad 1 and 2

Europa, Europa

Farewell My Concubine

Fido

Firecracker

Fitzcarraldo

From Here to Eternity

Gardens of the Night




Gaslight

The Great Dictator

The Great Water

The Guard

Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

Gun Crazy

High and Low

Human Centipede 2

Hunger

I Am Love




In Plane Sight

In The Mood For Love

Innocent Voices

Into The Abyss

Jazz Singer

Jules and Jim

The King’s Speech

La Antena

The Lady Eve

The Last Seduction




Le Samurai

The Leopard

Letter from an Unknown Woman

The Limits of Control

Liquid Sky

Look at Me

Lust, Caution

M. Butterfly

Midnight in Paris

Mother




Mother and Son

My Country, My Country

My Fair Lady

The Naked Spur

The Natural

Nobody Knows

Nostalghia

Not Quite Hollywood

La Notte

On The Beach




The Osterman Weekend

Our Own

Out of the Past

Outrage

Palookaville

Paper Moon

Paradise Lost 2

Paradise Lost 3

The Passion of Joan of Arc

The Perfect Host




Performance

Persona

The Philadelphia Story

Pickpocket

A Place in the Sun

Prince of the City

Rampart

The Red Shoes

Reds

A Room With a View




Salvatore Giuliano

Safety Last

A Seperation

A Serbian Film

Seven Men From Now

Shanghai Express

Silmido

Signs and Wonders

Sin Nombre

Sophie Scholl




Stalag 17

Sunset Story

Sweet Smell of Success

Take Shelter

Tell Them Who You Are

Terms of Endearment

Tetsuo

That Obscure Object of Desire

They Don’t Shoot Horses, Don’t They?

Visitor Q

Win, Win

The Wind That Shakes The Barley


Monday, April 9, 2012

We openly admit: our creations will be temporary.

Currently watching: Bellflower, Breaking Bad: Season 4, The Chaser

Currently reading: Shutter Island, Catching Fire, Game of Thrones

Currently listening to: Atmosphere, wait what, The Mars Volta

Long time no blog. Most of the time I amp up to write a new blog, I feel like it has been too long an interval between the two. Maybe I will make it a first quarter resolution to get in the habit of writing more in here. I keep a booklet of quotes I really enjoy from books I read, but that hardly fills the void of this computated diarrhea.


Still at Trader Joe’s but fingers crossed for other opportunities. Maybe that is what is at the top of a mountain; opportunity. For what though, who could say? It would be nice to have a set schedule. That would make it much easier to do various activities. I would like to get into some sort of outside sport or activity. I suggested to some friends of getting into Ju-Jitsu (again) and they seemed interested. It would be fun as well as a way to get in better shape.


Kim is in Ireland momentarily which is just making me miss her and our fun travels. I love going on adventures with her because it always seems so care free and spontaneous. I’m sure they are having a blast over there though.



I have been catching up on reading which always makes me happy and excited. I recently have finished the first book in The Hunger Games trilogy, Damned by Chuck Palahniuk, and Tree of Codes by Jonathan Safran Foer. I enjoyed The Hunger Games and am currently reading the second book, but I sort of lost steam/interest in it, but Kim is insisting I continue and I trust her opinion so on I go. It just made me want to re-watch Battle Royale and read that book. Damned started out kind of…meh…but the more I read, the better it got. It’s not up there with his earlier stuff, but it’s a step up from Tell-All and Snuff. Tree of Codes was very unique not only in the story, but the layout as well.



I also read The Passage, which I really enjoyed. With the current Vampire trend, it took me some convincing to pursue this book. The positive reviews from Stephen King and NPR pushed me over the edge and I jumped in with both feet. I’m glad I did too because it was really well written and had a fun and unique take on Vampires. I was also happy to find out that it is the first book in a planned trilogy (the second book being released in October).


Kim, Ed, and I took part in a real escape game a few weeks back in the city. It was called Escape From Werewolf Village and consisted of about 15 tables with 6 people at each table and a bunch of puzzles and mind-bending riddles to figure out who the werewolves were and how to “escape”. It was a lot of fun even though we barely scratched the surface. I feel like if we had played an escape game before we might have had a chance at getting a quarter of the way done. After the game, we saw a film called Sound of Noise. It was incredibly entertaining, funny, and refreshing.




Can not wait to see this gentleman on April 19th. It will be phenomenal. Also, The Revival Tour is on April 21st which is also exciting. Chuck Ragan + Dan Andriano + Tom Gabel = yes please. The rest is icing on the cake.











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Monday, January 30, 2012